My Sister's Engagement Party

 

Earlier this year I had the amazing opportunity to host my sister's engagement party. I already shared photos of the day on my social media, but I did not give a lot of context. I tried to let the photos speak for themselves. However, that was only a portion of the truth . . . Lots of people say I have a "charmed life" and truth be told, my life is far from it. Here on this blog and on my other social media I try to stay positive. That's why you all think my life is so charming. Far from it. So, in today's post I am going to tell you about my sister's engagement party and what happened. Then you can decide if my life is as charmed as you think it is. 

In leading up to the party, I knew I wanted to do it in all vintage style, and I did not want disposable items (napkins excluded) so I spend over a year sourcing out items for the party. I found beautiful glass teacups with matching saucers, a lace tablecloth, a 4-piece silver tea set, glass cups for fruit, and other assorted odds and ends to make the party as pretty as possible. When I was sourcing teacups, my sister told me to plan for 50 and so that's how many teacups I had to find. That's a lot of teacups . . . .

Flowers. I spend months sourcing flowers to fit my budget. I knew I wanted flowers to match what was around my home and I did find real ones, but I could not afford them. So, I went to the next best thing - artificial. I managed to find these really cool real touch latex roses and they were what I went with for the party. I would have loved real, but I also have cats and real flowers and cats are never a good mix. Another reason I went faux for the flowers was for pet safety. Good thing too because even though I had these flowers tucked into a safe space, the cats did manage to get into them. No harm, no foul. Another nice thing about faux flowers is that I can re-use them for other occasions which I have already done since the party. They have definitely proven their worth already.  

The food. I made all the food myself. It took two days to do because I had to plan for 50 - 75 guests. My menu came from a 1930s party book. I made a cherry-almond ring, a blueberry coffeecake, pineapple muffins, and little cream cheese cookies. I wanted something fresh too, so I added fresh fruit I cut into balls and then topped them with lemon twists and fresh mint leaves. For the beverages, it was a tea party, so I added hot tea with all the trimmings and a refreshing punch. I also had a hot food/ appetizer option too. I had cranberry meatballs that throughout the party I had handed out on a tray with little toothpicks and cocktail napkins. 

The setting was perfect, the food was ready. The silver was polished, the linens were pressed, and my aunt very kindly donated some extra tables and chairs for the occasion. All we needed were the guests! 

Months prior to the party I cooked up a prank. It was the only time I could ever pull a stunt like this, and I didn't want to lose the opportunity. In addition to inviting the real family, I invited "fake family" to pretend to be family members. You see, at this party, my sister was bringing her new father-in-law and new mother-in-law to meet her side of the family which they had yet to meet. This party was really meant to have many purposes - celebrate my sister's engagement and for her new family to meet her other family. I thought it would be funny to add fake family into the mix because how many times have you been to a party where you didn't recognize a cousin or other family member? The other reason I invited fake family was because there was a strong chance my sister and mines real family would not come to the party. Not kidding. 

I won't go into too much background here because that's a whole other story by itself. . . But I was disowned by my mom's side of the family years ago. I am not welcome at family functions or events. I have not been to that side's Christmas party in years. When my mom passed away, they blamed me for her death. When I was "close" to that side, they bullied me and put me down every opportunity they could. Since the party was at my place, and I was hosting it. . . There was a good chance they would not show, and I did not want my sister's party to be lacking guests. So, I planned to fill it with . . well . . .stunt doubles. 

Months prior, I put out a post on my personal Facebook and I quickly had about 10 people who were seriously interested in pretending to be my family. They were going to be my cousins, aunts, uncles, and more. I did let in some of my real family in on the prank. I am still close to my dad's side of the family. They were going to help the fake family blend with the real family to really sell it to my sister's new family. 

While I was planning all this party stuff and building the guest list, my personal life took a big step in gaining some peace. I ended my relationship with my boyfriend. I was tired of being bullied. I was tired of the little putdowns. The breaking point was when we were looking at a house and he wanted me to buy it, pay for it entirely and then put it into his name. To me that was unacceptable. I was tired of the feeling I was getting used. So, I took back my independence and kicked his ass to the curb. He took it badly and vented to some of his friends and some of our mutual friends. My "fake family" guest list was reduced to 3 people overnight. I guess they were not real friends. Actually, I am learning very fast that I really do not have as many real friends as I think. Still think my life is charmed? 

Closer to the party, the invites were sent out. 150 were invited to the party. Of that number, my sister told me 50 were going to come for sure. Real family too from mom's side. That was impressive so I knew they were going to come for my sister more than for me. That made me happy that they would show for her. This did not include the fake family which went from 10 to 3 . . .My sister had no idea about the fake family.  

The day of the party. It was a tea party from noon to 6. It was open house style to accommodate everyone's busy schedule. Come for a little bit or stay for a while the invite said. It was also 1940s themed, dressing to the theme was encouraged but not required. 

That morning it was so foggy!! It had misted earlier, and I was afraid of rain. But eventually the sun came out and it was going to be a beautiful day. My flowers were at peak bloom. My roses could not look any more beautiful. My wisteria was the best it had ever looked. My sister was going to have a beautiful party. Above all, mom's side was going to come. For my sister. That was the best part. It had taken a year for this to happen. I set up the tables, the chairs, and I brought everything out. I spread out the linens, and set up all the silver spoons, forks, and trappings of a tea party. I even set up a vintage wooden croquet game. My table was only so big. . . So, I set out 12 teacups and saucers and kept the rest in the kitchen ready and waiting. Same with the food, I plated what I could and kept the rest waiting in the wings. 

My sister arrived with her new family. They even came in 40s clothes! They loved the theme! They thought it was so cute. And the new father-in-law loved the music I had playing in the background. I was playing some 1940s big band swing. I had no idea it was his favorite music. My sister loved all the glass wear and food. She thought it was beautiful. She took lots of pictures. As far as the setting and surroundings went, perfection. 

Guests began to arrive. My dad's side, my aunt, uncle, and their son and his family came soon after my sister did and a great family friend too. My aunt and this family friend had a huge part in making this party possible. They helped me find teacups, the tea set and loaned me extra chairs for the occasion. This party really would not have been possible without them. Then one of the fake family members came. He was pretending to be my cousin and the effect was perfect! My friend who was now my cousin was absolutely perfect, he played his part like an award-winning actor. My sister was confused but her new family really thought he was our cousin on my dad's side. 

Then some of my mom's side showed . . . .My grandmother came with two of my aunts and some other people I did not know. It was 12:30 in the afternoon and they were far from sober. They were drunk and instead of joining the party, they set up a tail gate complete with beers in my driveway. I wanted to make the party alcohol free. In addition to showing up three sheets to the wind, bringing their own alcohol, they went around to some of the other guests telling them how awful my party was and how awful I was. They did not have anything kind to say about me or the party in my own home. On top of it, my grandfather did not show. He was golfing with friends instead and decided that was more important than my sister's engagement party.  Now, what about the grand parents on my dad's side you ask? They both passed away many years ago. 

In total, the party had a total of 15 guests and that included the guests of honor. I had a lot of food left over needless to say. And I have a lot of tea left over. The punch was a huge success, but I had a lot of that left over too. The next day was a day spent with my sister and her new family shopping downtown. It was a lot of fun until I got home. One of my aunts on my mom's side broke into my house to drop off some costume jewelry for my sister and then stayed in my driveway to tell me it was her that broke into my house. Not kidding. . .There were even witnesses. . . My sister and her family were shocked, and I was pissed. I was really pissed actually and told my aunt that she was rude, disrespectful, and breaking into someone's house is not ok. Her response? Since it was my house, it was ok . . . So, still think I have a charmed life?  

So that's the story behind my sister's engagement party. When people ask me how the party went, I have mixed emotions. . . Part of it was a success and part of it was a disaster. I usually tell people it was a success to keep the conversation short and sweet, but I feel a little weird about that because it's not the whole truth. I am a little frustrated about the whole thing because of the expense of the teacups. Had I known the turnout was going to be lite, I would have stuck with my original set of 12. Oh well, I guess I now collect teacup and saucers now. So why do I share this story? Because the beautiful and charmed life you see on social media is usually far from it. So next time you think your favorite social media personality is living a charmed life, think again.